Sometimes, bigly is not enough

One of Donald Trump’s biggest handicaps, and it’s not his golf handicap because I’m sure he doesn’t have one, but one of his biggest is his need to surround himself in bigness.

The biggest crowd. The highest ratings. The best people. Most persecuted president in history. The best economy—ever. The biggest, most beautiful wall, and we wouldn’t even have to pay for it. That’s the bestest of all. He ran in 2016 on making America great. In 2020, he’s running on making it greater. If he could run for a third term, it'd be to make America the greatest of all time.

While other national leaders conduct diplomacy, Trump exchanges “love letters”—with dictators, no less.

The trouble with living your whole life in the superlative world of EST—even if it exists only in your own mind, which incidentally, also happens to border on genius—the trouble is at some point life at the top—the best, biggest, highest, longest, most is no longer good enough.

Take missiles.

After escalating the missile crisis to the point where Russia and the United States between them had enough missiles to not only blow up the planet, but half the solar system, common sense set in. Both countries agreed to start reducing their stockpiles. That actually was one of the best decisions of the last half century.

Alas, not being the best nuclear power was unsustainable. Both nations are at it again.

Russia’s Avangard hypersonic missile system can fly faster and lower and pack a more powerful punch, giving Putin bragging rights.

It does look like the Cold War is on again, but wait! Trump isn’t your ordinary war time president. He’s America’s greatest war time president. You have to get up pretty early to get the jump on Trump because the man never sleeps.

Trump is the greatest, “anything you can do, I can do better” man. Putin will rue the day he ever met Trump, which is saying a lot because right now, Putin thinks the day he was introduced to Trump was the greatest day of his life.

Trump recently announced that he has America on a path to develop the world’s first—wait for it—“Super-duper missile.” If that doesn’t scare the living daylight out of Putin, I don’t know what will. Actually, he’s probably a little concerned that Trump won’t be re-elected. Best day ever could turn into the worst day ever.

It’s one thing to be the greatest war president ever. It’s another laurel in his MAGA hat to be one of America’s greatest medical minds. Fighting the greatest virus ever, which some people say was brought to this country in a Corona beer bottle smuggled across the border by a Mexican rapist working for Obama, calls for extraordinary skill.

We need a vaccine and we need it fast. How fast? Some of the best minds in the country say a vaccine might take as much as eighteen months, maybe a year if we’re lucky.

Trump laughs at luck. In the White House Rose Garden, he announced “Operation Warp Speed,” the push to get a vaccine by the fall.

Super-duper missiles? Warp-speed vaccine development? Is there anything the man can't do?

Actually, there is.

I’ve never heard anyone walk away after one of his announcements declaring it the greatest speech ever. Usually, his talks are followed by someone explaining what the hell he said.