Who
killed the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t our
fault,” said the gun lobby
We’re only
protecting an American hobby
‘Sides, guns
don’t kill people, people do
If you’re
looking to place blame, maybe it was you
Second
Amendment says guns are a right
You know
you’d want one in a fight
So don’t you
come looking for me
Cause I’m
armed to the gills, as you can see
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“Not me,”
said the political strategist
Times are
‘a-changin’, I’m just a catalyst
I take polls
and line up venues
Schedule
flights and finalize menus
I make ads,
and yes, some get nasty
I gotta be
tough. I ain’t no patsy
I don’t want
to hear ‘bout no dirty tricks
Those
Democrats can also be pricks
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t
me,” said the global warming denier
It’s
freezing outside, so now whose the liar
Those bergs
have been around a million years
Now that they’re
gone, I’ll shed no tears
Sure, some
were big and some were greater
They were
all bound to melt, sooner or later
God gave us
the world and said go use it
He never
said nothing ‘bout not abusin’ it
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t
me,” said the pious evangelical
Why must
everyone be so cynical
When I see a
wrong in my line of sight
It’s my duty
to speak out and make it right
The world’s
not perfect, so it’s my job
To make
heathens listen to the word of God
The end is
coming and it’s coming soon
Everybody
better start singing my tune
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t
me,” said the strict Constitutionalist
Looking at
his list of people-to-take-down-to-do list
We’ve got
laws to uphold, and goals to meet
Getting rid
of slackers would make them easier to keep
Don’t give
me that shit ‘bout the times ‘a-changin’
It’s there
in black and white, that’s all I’m saying
The
forefathers, they were quite explicit
Read the
Constitution, but don’t dare dis it
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“Not me,”
said the billionaire
With the
flaming mop of orange hair
Some say
suckers are born every minute
My jobs to
show ‘em a new way to spin it
Tell him and
show him what he wants to see
Any of you
would do it, might as well be me
Don’t call
me a pathological liar
I’m just
lighting a political fire
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
It wasn’t us
Capitalists, we just like money
We take to
it like bees to honey
Everyone can
be rich, that ain’t no secret
Just get a
good job and work hard to keep it
If you can’t
do that, and not all can
It doesn’t
hurt if your dad’s an oil man
It isn’t
money that brought down the party
It’s those
Harvard elites and other smarties
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
It wasn’t us
Conservatives, that’s for sure
We don’t
even know what we’re against or for
We do know
that we like the past
Sure wish
those days could have last-ed
Can’t a man
dream of bygone days and days of yore
Of times
when twenty was recorded as a score
Liberals are
always on the go
While we
kind of like the status quo
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t
us,” said the Tea Party idealists
We’re
patriots, we never said we were realists
Maybe we’re
old school, but we’re no dinos
We’re just
tired of dealing with RINOs
Someone
stole the government and we can’t find it
Sure,
everyone hates our butt, but we don’t mind it
We didn’t
turn the world turvy-topsy
So don’t put
us in your fuckin’ autopsy
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“Don’t go
blaming me,” said the Obama hater
He was bound
to screw up sooner or later
Maybe he’s a
Kenyan, or maybe Hawaiian
If his lips
are moving, I know he’s lying
He went to
Libya, when he shouldn’t have
Didn’t go to
Syria when he could have
All we ever
wanted was to take him down
None of us
can believe he’s still around
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“Not me,”
said the illegal Hispanic immigrant
In a country
this big, I barely leave a fingerprint
Blame me for
this, blame me for that
All I wanted
was a place to hang my hat
I do the
dirty jobs and clean your pools
Amigo! I’ve
been to college, I ain’t no fool
Estamos en
un lugar duro (We are in a tough
spot)
Pero no
somos asesinos (But we are not
killers)
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
“It wasn’t
us,” said the primary voters
We’re just a
bunch of daydreamers and hopers
We wanted
someone to speak to our fears
To sooth our
pain and wipe away our tears
We didn’t
mean for anyone to get hurt
We like the
Party, just not the jerks
That’s not
true, I guess you realize
All we know
is we sure can’t compromise
Who killed
the GOP?
I dunno. It
wasn’t me.
On second
thought, maybe we all share the blame
It doesn’t
matter, we’re losing just the same.
